So what the hell is Panera Fantasy anyways? Somebody said they thought it was a play. And of course, in a way, it was a play. Where I played the Chef and Asreen played Baker and Tali played Expo but also on set counselor, because I was dissociated for most of it.
 
Dissociation In Papyrus Font. That seems like an appropriate conceptual understanding of what I was after. Isn’t it a shame the event I dreamed up happened and it actually all went well, and yet - that haunting existential chasm I carry around wasn’t even touched? I thought tomato soup was going to fill my chasm. I wanted bread bowls and tomato soup because who doesn’t want that? I see bread bowls as a superior vessel that wink to a past bathed in warm homesickness. Bathe me in warm tomato soup. No it’s not in season. It’s in season spiritually. 

Panera Fantasy is an homage to a moment in my consciousness that I miss and don’t miss. The menu completed a memory of my psyche. Psychic associations. Dirt happened because it’s an old head dessert that soothes. I guess Panera Fantasy could also be called Lior self-soothes and hopes to soothe you too. I wasn’t soothed, I was irked and grumpy and stressed. Why would providing comfort be stressful? 

I was kind of hoping Panera would sue me for using their name. I considered adding an “s” to end so it would be Paneras Fantasy. Not Panera’s Fantasy, but Paneras, phonetically Paneris. It made me laugh. It doesn’t matter if you understand, each menu item was a token, and edible talisman. Jones Soda was there for those who knew. One guest really knew that the best flavor was creme soda. One guest used to work at Panera, it felt amazing to serve her. I bought old Panera Cadet Style Green Caps from ebay to wear, they really weren’t cute they made me look like I truly worked there. 

“World Off, Asreen said, Panera On.”